with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
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