if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Randomize
