How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Randomize