I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Four minutes until I can fart!
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Randomize
