I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
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