I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize
