I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
