he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
