when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Randomize
