Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
i think i scared a bird with my dick
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
