I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
