He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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