I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
