Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
