I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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