Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.

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(501): View more from Arkansas

Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick

Fav 27 4854 1347
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(714): View more from California

He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.

Fav 17 1744 7197
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(913): View more from Kansas

I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach

Fav 5 814 1301
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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.

Fav 7 1456 753
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(201): View more from New Jersey

sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...

(732): View more from New Jersey

I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.

Fav 3 804 1303
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(504): View more from Louisiana

Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"

Fav 1 285 140
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(425): View more from Washington

I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.

Fav 0 26 30
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(510): View more from California

Will exercising make me less horny?

Fav 0 41 10
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