all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
