yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
