If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
