Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize
