i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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