That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
