How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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