he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
