bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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