She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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