Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
And then the night went full on bisexual.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
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