It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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