I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
