Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
