Are we in a gay sports bar?
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Sorry my hands just texted you
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
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