I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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