i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
