I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
