Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
