hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
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