I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
