Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Randomize
