He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
