Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
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