She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
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