I don't think brook has ever known best
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
