did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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