i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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