also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
