On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
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