dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Is this like a preordered booty call?
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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