kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize