I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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