Whod you bang
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Randomize
