Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
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