in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize