The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
